Wednesday, October 11, 2006


A Little Comment Goes A Long Way . . .

Two days late, our new bi-weekly feature.

Shorter Natasha Walter: When I decide what to see at the cinema, I'm more bothered about the gender of the director than whether it's any good or not.

Shorter Agnes Poirier: I'm so bored by the story of Marie-Antoinette I thought I'd write a column about her.

Shorter Larry Elliott: It seems that Gordon Brown would like to be Prime Minister!

Shorter David Epstein: Money can't buy Terrell Owens happiness.

Shorter Peter Tatchell: Watch as I magically turn a meaningless insult muttered at a moment of high stress into a homophobic incident.

Shorter Jim Wild: The Amish school shooter was just like other men, only a bit more manly.

Shorter Will Hutton: Naomi Klein says capitalism is bad. I agree, and British companies aren't good enough at it.

Shorter Michelle Malkin: Charlotte Church's lungs are public property.

Shorter Fiona Millar: Parents who give their children 'light taps' and 'trivial smacks' are child-abusers too.

Shorter Sarita Malik: Policemen shouldn't have to protect people who they philosophically disagree with.

Shorter Ros Taylor: The reason the Conservatives suck is that they insist on holding their party conference at the seaside.

Shorter Gary Younge: White people are solely responsible for the rise of Islamic extremism.

Shorter Peter Preston: If only the EU was designed like the Ryder Cup, with one purpose and one common enemy.

These are very funny, but what were their original contexts?
SafeT: If you follow the links, you can see the original column. This is meant to be a one-sentence "summary" of each column that actually mocks it by reducing its premise to absurdity. This is also done regularly at Busy, Busy, Busy and Sadly, No!'s Two Minute Town Hall.
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