Tuesday, April 19, 2005


That Dang Camel

In the 'Pub Names' post comments, Mr Fist (whose blog is in the process of being added to the links list) suggests 'The Elusive Camel' as his favourite pub name. Damn straight - it's a great pub name.

Reminds me of a joke. It's alright, as these things go:

It's the war in the Sudan at the end of the nineteenth century. The war is going pretty well for Britain, and generally the morale is high. A new captain is appointed to a remote fortress in the Sahara, and he is determined to keep the morale of the troops up. He is given a tour of the fortress by his second-in-command, and it seems fairly well stocked with the amenities needed for the long war expected. The captain has just one problem.
"Ummm, I have an embarassing question" said the captain.
"Yes, sir?" was the reply.
The captain musters his courage.
"What do the men do when they want sex?" he finally blurted.
"Oh well, when that happens, there's always the camel" said the SIC, blushing.
The captain was disturbed by this piece of information, but given the high morale of the troops, he decided to let the situation go.

Many months passed.

Finally, the captain was desperate himself. The frustration of months of pent up sex was in him. He yelled to the SIC;
"Get me the camel!"
"Yes, sir!"
So out came the camel. The captain dropped his trousers, and proceeded to ride that camel like he'd never ridden a camel before. The exertion was clear in his eyes. As well as in the grunting. Finally, he climaxed, and the camel died, such was the force of the captains pleasure.
"Well, what do you think of that?" he asked the SIC, flushed with pride.
"Well, sir, we used to ride it to the brothel down the road."

I've heard a joke very similar to that, but it takes place in the Yukon and with a caribou rather than a camel. And the other men really ARE humping the caribous, but when the outsider finally gives in and does, the others are disgusted because, 'man, that's the ugliest caribou i've ever seen". Now I've gone an ruined the whole joke, but you can imagine it being funny.
I think there are several variations on the theme. One not so good as those two is about a guy sent to work on an oilrig miles out to sea.

He arrives, finds that there are only male staff on the rig, and asks the predictable question, only to be told about 'The Barrel', a large empty barrel into which a hole for the penis is inserted.

Predictably, he starts to need it, and so goes down to the room where The Barrel is held. He shoves his knob inside, and receives a surprisingly skillful blowjob. Satisfied, he retreats, and thinks no more about it until he needs it again. He returns, and gets another equally good blowjob. This repeats several times, until finally he asks his best friend on the rig how the contraption works.

His mate says, "it's your turn inside next week."

Not the best.
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